i’ve never been the type of girl who likes shopping for clothes and make up. i never understood how women could spend so much time shopping, but today, i understood.

there are three things in life that i find most painful to shop for: jeans (women, you know what i’m talking about), make up, and bras.

jeans are hard because designers have a very convoluted way of indicating size. some brands i’m a 8 while others i’m a 16. what the heck? men have it so easy 36 inch by blah blah long. why can’t they just do that for women too? then you’ve got to decide which style: straight leg, flaired, hip huggers, the list is endless. they say the average women tries on an average of 10 pairs of jeans for every one they like. i think that’s a gross underestimation.

makeup is not easy to shop for either, finding that perfect shade of foundation to match your skin is a near impossible task. you’ve all seen women who wear foundation three shades lighter than their neck. it’s not pretty. i have yet to find a shade of lipstick that looks good on me. some women look great wearing lipstick. i look like a clown.

i’ve gained a bit of weight and everything about me is a little bit bigger: my arms, my legs, my belly… other parts of me.

enlisting the help of a female friend, i braved the grueling task of bra shopping. 4 hours, $170, and two Antie Ann’s pretzels later i managed to leave with 5 bras.

our first stop was victoria secret where i got fitted. apparently, i’m a 34DD. i’m telling you, it’s not easy finding a bra in that size.

despite the sale at victoria secret, i still got sticker shock. two bras for $90!!! that’s NINETY DOLLARS. i have never bought a bra that cost more than $15 before. ahhh, the price of a well fitting bra. it wasn’t long after that the buyer’s remorse set in. i contemplated returning the bras and heading to walmart, like i normally do, but i hung on to them.

we hit the fredricks, the macy’s, and god knows how many other stores trying on bras. it was not a pleasant experience. finding a bra that fits right is no easy task. that $90 i spent was starting to seem a lot more reasonable. i tried on a bra and it fit like a dream. it was $62! yikes. but it fit like a dream. but it was $62. i just couldn’t do it.

i found three more bras, they fit well enough. $20 each. much better.

i hate bra shopping. i really HATE bra shopping.